By George Streeter Relationship Coach
Scarcity is the most lethal killer of romantic interest in a woman, second only to being a jerk. It is the silver bullet shot into the heart of the beast known as romantic passion. Nothing irritates women more than the relentless, selfish motivational energy that is scarcity.
What is it exactly? and how do I know if I am operating in it?
Well for starters scarcity is completely different from hunger or desire, which offer their own unique benefits and problems. Scarcity is the itch on a phantom limb that can never be scratched. It is the idea that there is an inadequate amount to go around for everyone. Satiation for a person who lives with thoughts of scarcity is an impossibility.
How do you know if you have a scarcity mentality about relationships? Here are three simple ways. There are others of course but a yes to any of theses questions means you have a few issues to work out before you can completely enjoy what you have.
1. You feel jealously and envy of what other men have that you (perceive you) don’t.
If you have a scarcity mindset you see resources as limited, so love and pleasure are resources and de facto limited. This is obviously absurd, because love, pleasure and connection are never limited, but are in fact unlimited. The loss of equilibrium at the thought of someone having something that is unavailable to you…. scarcity mentality.
2. You see other men as threats and rivals.
When you walk into a room with a woman on your arm, do you tense up at the site of a group of men in the room? Do you feel aggressive and over protective? Men are a great source of camaraderie and a group of guys can provide the energy and support needed to help a man get out of his comfort zone and live a little. If there is an abundance of resources available to you, there is no need to create a rivalry. If scarcity is your mental state, then even your friends appear to be potential rivals.
3. You feel that you will be forgotten if you don’t take act in your own best interest.
When you feel compelled to initiate every action in the relationship ( to get what you need) while feeling frustration that you must initiate every action in your relationship (to get what you need), you are in scarcity. This attitude diminishes the opportunity for your partner to meet you at your desires. Basically you are not giving others a chance to show you how wonderful you are to them.
If your relationship is on a respirator it may be because of a scarcity mindset. Operating as a person who believes in abundance is the only way to break the cycle scarcity, the most potent killer of romantic passion.